She

She had old fashioned eyes
and the taste of licorice
on her skin.

She took spiced rum
with her pineapple juice
and a medley of natural
herbs in her tea.

She came packaged in
paisley trappings with
streamers and bows

with scents of the sea
and the sass of the city.

She loved trains, the low
rumble of the ride and the
moan of the whistle
in the night.

She said she would always
remember my smile.

 

 

 

 

 

 

For one list of Shawna’s Poetic words.

Advertisements

19 Comments

Filed under Poetry, Poetry - Prompts

19 responses to “She

  1. I LOVE your opening line: “She had old fashioned eyes”

    “She took spiced rum with her pineapple juice” … I know her, and I’m smiling. 🙂 I used to borrow her drink order every time we went out together. Actually, I didn’t even have to; she always ordered for me.

    “She came packaged in
    paisley trappings” … Oh wow, lovely sound and meaning here.

    “with scents of the sea
    and the sass of the city” … Lots more smiles. 🙂

    Ugh, you make even a breakup sound sensual. She seems so alluring that you don’t even know your heart’s been broken until after the train’s left the station. I picture you shaking your head trying to figure out what just happened.

    I also dig S5. And this girl. Thanks for writing, Mark. Oh, and I like the streamers and bows … especially since your birthday was yesterday … like she threw you a bash and then took off on you.

  2. Oh, MAN. I loveloveLOVE this, especially: She came packaged in
    “paisley trappings with
    streamers and bows

    with scents of the sea
    and the sass of the city.”

    Fantastic.

  3. I loved this! Especially …
    She came packaged in
    paisley trappings with
    streamers and bows
    Well done!

  4. I love the nostalgia in this, Mark. I do think that some people’s smiles ARE memorable, and one would never forget them….ever.

  5. Laurie Kolp

    Fleeting relationships are difficult, but to be remembered by a smile is so sweet.

  6. Such a lovely painting of the woman ~ memorable indeed ~

    And congrats on your Beneath Notice in Nain, I remember reading this
    before ~ Cheers ~

  7. The fist stanza is absolutely sublime. I love the way you used all the senses, made me want to run into this girl. Amazing.

  8. peggygoetz

    Such a fascinating description–makes me want to know more about her and her story.

  9. “I will always remember you” is quite an exit line for a goddess that you will always remember as perfect as in the first meeting! I like this a lot. BTW: congratulations on your Nain Rouge publication–I think I say you there?

  10. awww. and trains! and the sass of the city. dig it.

  11. Helen

    … and paisley! note to self: dig paisley out of storage!

  12. I’ll bet she will… always remember… you clearly shall.

  13. Mark, this is nostalgic, lovely, sad romantic, etc.

  14. She sounds pretty special……..love the “sass of the city”……..

Some of what I write is true, some is fiction; most is merely possibility.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s