Weeds

Bastard!

She spat the epitaph
at his back as he
……….walked away,
………………leaving her reeling ……………hurt …………..rejected………scarred.

………………No other invective
………seeming appropriate
at the time.

Others occurred
…………………….to her later —

written down her
arms with a

fine point black
marker

while exploring craven
…………………thoughts.

She no longer calls
…………him names,
………………but sits —

with vacant smile, absent
expression, fingers
combing her hair

…..on the warped,
……..weather-bitten stone placed
………….over his head,
……………….pulling any weed
……………………that dares to grow
………………………….from the ill-nurtured soil.

60.365 you are going to move through this  #27...

(Photo credit: ashley rose,)

 

For the second of Shawna’s word lists this week. The words seemed to lend themselves to a little madness…..

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25 Comments

Filed under Poetry, Poetry - Prompts

25 responses to “Weeds

  1. Holy cow. This is powerful.

  2. I’ve read it once, and I love it. Visually interesting, strong story, emotional. And now I’m headed back to the top.

    • So, you rock. And “bastard” is exactly what you’d call someone who left you too early. Not that you mean it, just that you don’t know how to process your feelings. I think there were weeds in their relationship to begin with. But then maybe their last encounter was a fight, and then he died. How can you recover/heal from that? In the end, I picture her sitting on his gravestone in a state of madness, pulling weeds because she doesn’t know what else to do. I think “ill nurtured soil” describes the relationship before it was ended by death.

      And when I read “stone over his head,” I first pictured her smashing him over the head with the stone and killing him. So that might also play into this as well.

  3. What a strong write, Mark. Whew!

  4. Screenplay in a poem. Tight, direct and vivid.

  5. as Sherry may say ‘Wowzers!’. very well written..just the right spunk.

  6. Phew!… He done her wrong and, she lived to tell the tale and even though he did her wrong, she won’t allow weeds to grow. Stunning and powerful write Mark.

  7. POW!! You got me awed.

  8. Holy cow, that is one heck of a story you’ve told here! The bitter regret just flows through this, A very strong write!

  9. Laurie Kolp

    Wow… another amazing piece, Mark!

  10. Mark–this is so powerful. Really good read.

  11. oooooohhh. wow. excellent.

  12. Not like this isn’t right up my ally! I love to dance in madness and the best art is dark! 🙂 Fantastic weave, pen wielder…hope I’m not getting too redundant…but awesome is as awesome does…do you “dabble” in fiction as well?

  13. This is creepy. I love the crazy way you have laid it out, echoing the meaning.

  14. snap…tight with emotion and i rather like her posture as now it is her turn to sit over him…smiles.

  15. hedgewitch

    What goes around so often comes around. Sharp and incisive throughout, Mark, and the hint of madness is not overdone–just right.

  16. Strong and good write!

  17. wow, this is fabulous, you had me wondering at the title until the end, and then of course, it is just perfect. great write!

  18. Agree with much of what has been said before me, a really intriguing read, very powerful.

  19. I know that feeling of walking around and still feel buried under concrete. It takes Olympic strength to cast it off. Wonderful capture!

  20. Leo

    Damn.. that ending just blew me away.. The way you began it, I thought it was a break-up, but as I read on, the words just played, and it was a break-up of more magnanimous proportions. Kudos.

    ~ Leo @ I Rhyme Without Reason ~

Some of what I write is true, some is fiction; most is merely possibility.

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